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Shell CEO Threatens London Stock Exchange

Posted by John Donovan: 10 April 2024

In a move that has the London Stock Exchange quaking in its trading boots, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan has dropped a bombshell threat: Shape up or we ship out to the Big Apple!

Sawan, not one to mince his words, has warned that if London’s stock market continues to undervalue Shell, they’re packing their bags and heading Stateside faster than you can say “oil spill.” 

Despite enjoying the swanky lifestyle in London, Sawan’s loyalty to the UK is about as solid as a house of cards in a hurricane. With dual Lebanese and Canadian citizenship, he’s got one foot out the door already. He’s sick and tired of London investors treating Shell like yesterday’s news while simultaneously picking their pockets clean with hefty taxes. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Boss Bags £8m: “Let Them Eat Carbon Intensity Reductions”

Posted by John Donovan 8 April 2024

In a move that has charity workers choking on their avocado toast, Shell’s new top dog, Wael Sawan, has snagged a staggering £8 million in his first year at the helm, leaving many wondering if he’s moonlighting as a magician pulling money out of thin air.

While most folks are counting pennies at the pump, Sawan is raking in the cash like it’s going out of style, leaving pressure groups frothing at the mouth faster than you can say “climate crisis.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Dutch Senate Hits Snooze Button on Closing Groningen Gas Field

Posted by John Donovan: 7 April 2024

In a move that screams “procrastination at its finest,” the Dutch Senate has pushed back the vote on permanently shutting down the Groningen gas field, citing concerns over the country’s energy security. Because who needs timely decisions when you can kick the can down the road, right?

Originally slated for closure on October 1, 2023, and then extended to this October, the Groningen gas field was supposed to bid farewell to its gas-pumping days. But alas, the specter of earthquakes and energy insecurity looms large, prompting the government to consider keeping the field operational just in case winter throws a chilly tantrum. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Disappointed: Lower Q1 Earnings Expected from Natural Gas Trading

Posted by John Donovan 7 April 2024

In a stunning twist of fate that surely shook the ivory towers of Shell, the UK-based oil giant confessed to expecting a downturn in its Integrated Gas division’s trading results for the first quarter of 2024. Brace yourselves, folks; it seems they won’t be swimming in gold coins this time around.

Shell, in its prophetic earnings preview released on Friday, forecasted a “significant” dip in trading and optimization results compared to the dazzling performance it put on in the fourth quarter of 2023. Oh, the agony of not being able to sustain such brilliance! read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s “Dragon” Scheme: Seeking a License to Pollute

Posted by John Donovan 4 April 2024

In a move that surprises absolutely no one, Shell is angling for a long-term license from the US government for their latest gas project in Venezuela. Because apparently, when it comes to exploiting natural resources and wrecking the planet, Shell just can’t get enough.

Dubbed the “Dragon” field, this little venture is estimated to contain a whopping 4.2 trillion cubic feet of gas – because why settle for small-scale environmental destruction when you can go big, right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Corporate Doublespeak: “Sorry, But We Can’t Save the Planet if You Can’t Pay Your Energy Bill!”

Posted by John Donovan 2 April 2024

In a bizarre turn of events that left many scratching their heads in disbelief, Shell has taken to the courts to argue that saving the planet might just be a tad too expensive. Because who needs clean air and a livable future when you can have cheap gas and record profits, am I right?

As a crucial climate case unfolded in The Hague, lawyers for Shell PLC pulled out all the stops with their jaw-dropping argument: If ordinary citizens can’t afford their energy bills, then forget about saving the planet. Because apparently, the only thing standing between us and climate catastrophe is the price of a monthly utility bill.

In what can only be described as a masterclass in corporate doublespeak, Shell’s lawyer, Daan Lunsingh Scheurleer, solemnly declared in court: “If people can no longer pay for their energy or that energy is no longer reliable… the support of people in the country… for the energy transition will be lost.” Translation: Sorry, folks, but saving the planet is just too damn expensive. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Hilarious Defence: “Reducing Emissions Hinders Our Quest to Destroy the Planet!”

“…a move that left environmentalists scratching their heads and laughing hysterically…”: “And the punchline? We’re all the ones left laughing – or crying – as the world burns.”

Posted by John Donovan 2 April 2024

In a stunning display of corporate audacity, Shell has taken to a Dutch court to argue that reducing greenhouse gas emissions would somehow hinder the noble cause of climate change. Because who needs a habitable planet when you can have record profits, am I right?

In a move that left environmentalists scratching their heads and laughing hysterically, a lower Dutch court had the audacity to order Shell to cut its planet-warming carbon emissions by a measly 45 percent by 2030. Shocking, I know. But fear not, for Shell is here to save the day with its ingenious argument: “This case has no legal basis.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Oil’s Climate Goals: A Masterclass in Greenwashing or Just a Load of Bull?

Posted by John Donovan 2 April 2024

In a move that could only be described as “bold,” Shell Oil has graciously gifted the world with its latest climate strategy, dubbed the “Shell Energy Transition Strategy 2024.” Oh, how we’ve been eagerly awaiting this gem from the fine folks who brought you oil spills and environmental devastation!

According to this masterpiece of corporate spin, Shell has decided to make a few tweaks to its climate goals. You know, nothing major. Just a slight downgrade of its 2030 target from a 20% reduction in net carbon intensity to a dazzling 15-20%. And who needs a target for 2035 anyway? Certainly not a titan of the fossil fuel industry like Shell. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Appeals Climate Ruling, Insists on Right to Trash the Planet Unabated

Posted by John Donovan 2 April 2024

In a move that redefines chutzpah, Shell Plc is set to defend its rapacious environmental practices in a Dutch court, challenging a landmark ruling that dared to suggest the oil and gas behemoth should reduce its planet-murdering emissions.

The audacious district court ruling in 2021, which Shell now dares to contest, ordered the company to slash its greenhouse gas emissions by a measly 45% by 2030 from 2019 levels. Apparently, that’s the equivalent of asking Godzilla to cut back on his stomping by 45% to preserve Tokyo.

Shell, the poster child for environmental negligence, has the gall to argue that such an order lacks a “legal base.” They even have the nerve to claim that they can’t be held responsible for the emissions caused by the very products they gleefully peddle to the masses. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Greenpeace Lawsuit Mocked by Celebrities: “Seriously, Shell? What the Hell?”

Moreover, the letter condemns Shell’s recent strategic shift back toward increasing oil and gas production, deriding it as a profit-driven move that spells disaster for the planet.

Posted by John Donovan 1st April 2024

In a scathing open letter, a coalition of Hollywood A-listers led by Emma Thompson, Stephen Fry, and Benedict Cumberbatch have slammed Shell for its “callous and vindictive” legal crusade against Greenpeace. The letter, signed by a slew of prominent figures including Greta Thunberg and supported by environmental groups like Extinction Rebellion, lambasts Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan for orchestrating “one of the biggest attacks on Greenpeace’s right to protest in the organisation’s 53-year history.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Oil Giants’ Climate Targets Go Up in Smoke

Another day, another dose of corporate greed and environmental destruction. Will these oil giants ever learn? Or will they continue to put profits over the planet?

Posted by John Donovan 30 March 2024

Brace yourselves for another round of corporate shenanigans, this time starring none other than Shell, the world’s second-largest oil and gas company. In a move that surprises absolutely no one except maybe the most optimistic tree-hugger, Shell has decided to scale back its climate pledges. Saving the planet is just too darn risky for these fossil fuel titans.

Shell’s chief executive, Wael Sawan, voiced his concerns to Reuters, declaring it “perilous” to set emission reduction targets for 2035 due to the “uncertainty” in the energy transition trajectory. Translation: We’re not sure if we want to stop destroying the planet just yet, folks. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Faces Hague Climate Case: Another Masterclass in Hypocrisy and Legal Gymnastics

…grab your popcorn and get ready to witness Shell and six environmental and social organizations duke it out in court, led by none other than Milieudefensie (aka Friends of the Earth Netherlands) and Greenpeace Netherlands.

Posted by John Donovan 30 March 2024

Look who’s back in court again. That’s right, folks, it’s none other than Shell PLC, the poster child for environmental destruction and corporate greed. Next Tuesday, Shell’s appeal over its laughable attempt to shirk responsibility for reducing CO2 emissions comes to court in The Hague, and it promises to be a spectacle worthy of the big screen.

In a move that surprises absolutely no one, the oil supermajor is challenging a 2021 court decision that dared to order it to cut emissions under international climate agreements. Because, when it comes to saving the planet, Shell would rather stick its head in the sand and pretend like nothing’s wrong. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and Co.’s Latest Scheme: Dumping CO2 in Southeast Asia, Because Why the Hell Not?

Posted by John Donovan 28 March 2024

Hold onto your hats, folks, because it looks like the oil giants have come up with a brilliant new plan to tackle climate change: burying massive amounts of CO2 deep underground in Southeast Asia. Yes, you heard that right. After decades of gleefully pumping carbon into the atmosphere like there’s no tomorrow, Exxon, Shell, Chevron, and their merry band of polluters have suddenly had a change of heart—or more likely, a change of profit margins.

You see, carbon dioxide storage is the latest cash cow for these fossil fuel fiends, promising them billions in revenue while they continue to wreak havoc on our planet. And where better to dump their toxic waste than in countries like Indonesia and Malaysia, where regulations are lax and profits are high?

Exxon Mobil’s CEO Darren Woods is practically giddy at the prospect, boasting about securing “exclusive rights to CO2 storage” in these unsuspecting nations. Nothing says “saving the planet” like monopolizing the substance driving us towards environmental catastrophe. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Flaring Fiasco: Deer Park Chemical Plant Puts on a Light Show, Community Left in the Dark

…while Shell may be busy burning off whatever toxic cocktail they’ve brewed up this time, the folks in Deer Park are left choking on the fumes, both literally and figuratively.

Posted by John Donovan: 27 March 2024

Gather ’round for another dazzling display of Shell’s exceptional commitment to environmental stewardship—or lack thereof. In a feat that could rival the best fireworks show in town, the Deer Park chemical plant has been lighting up the sky with flares since last Thursday, and guess what? The party’s just getting started!

Now, you might think that flaring during an emergency is a cause for celebration, a reassuring sign that all is well in the kingdom of fossil fuels. But hold your applause, dear citizens, because while Shell may be busy burning off whatever toxic cocktail they’ve brewed up this time, the folks in Deer Park are left choking on the fumes, both literally and figuratively. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Russia’s Shell Game: Sakhalin LNG Stake Swapped Like Trading Cards, This Time Gazprom Wins

Posted by John Donovan: 27 March 2024

Well, well, well, folks, gather ’round for another chapter in the thrilling saga of Shell’s misadventures in the land of oil and oligarchs. In this latest installment, the Russian government has decided to play a game of hot potato with Shell’s minority stake in the Sakhalin LNG project, ultimately passing it off to their favorite playmate, state-controlled behemoth Gazprom, for a cool $1 billion.

Now, let’s rewind a bit, shall we? Shell, ever the enterprising multinational, originally held the reins in this project until they found themselves caught up in a web of intrigue involving insider info, espionage, and more drama than a daytime soap opera. And who’s behind this plot twist, you ask? None other than yours truly, providing juicy tidbits to the Russian government back in the day, leading to Shell setting up their very own spy network. Ah, the things we do for love—err, I mean, gas. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell CEO Laments: “How Dare You Sue Us for Ruining the Planet!”

That’s right, folks—while the rest of the world is desperately trying to curb emissions, Shell is busy backpedaling on its promises faster than you can say “hypocrisy.”

Posted 24 March 2024 by John Donovan

In a jaw-dropping display of corporate entitlement, Frans Everts, the CEO of Shell Netherlands, took to the airwaves to bemoan the audacity of environmental organizations daring to sue companies like Shell. Because clearly, holding polluting behemoths accountable for their role in climate catastrophe is just plain unfair, right?

In a riveting performance on TV program WNL Op Zondag, Everts cried foul, claiming that climate lawsuits were nothing short of economic sabotage. “It does not solve the problems,” he lamented, conveniently forgetting that maybe—just maybe—stopping the relentless pollution might actually, you know, solve a few problems. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
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